So I seriously don't know how to not have one(or two, or SOMETIMES three) night stands anymore. I really don't know what it means to go on an actual date anymore. To me, all dates start at 11 pm or later and end sometime the next morning. In fact, even when the guy tries to set up some type of normal interaction with me, say, within the after-work hours of 6-8, I manifest it so that only sex can be had, and only dirty, hidden, nasty slut sex. For example, about a month ago, this guy who I really was into asked me to hang out one night. He called me around 5 pm and I didn't pick up. Purposefully. Then I debated whether or not to call him back or not. He calls again around 7. I don't pick up but call him right back. He doesn't pick up. Then he calls me right back. I pick up with much prodding from roommate. He asks what I'm doing. It's about 8 pm. I tell him a half-truth that insinuates that I'm too busy to hang out, but I end the conversation by asking him what he's doing later. Typical traits of a passive aggressive. So I tell him to call me later. He calls me in like an hour and a half, I tell him I'm still busy. He goes out with friends, calls me about an hour after that. I'm supposedly still busy but want to hang out later. He says he'll call me after hanging out with friends. Calls but I don't pick up. Then I call back around 1 am. Only then do I decide to hang out with him. We hang out from 2 to 3. So you see that I can only meet with someone during the graveyard shift in order to have any type of meaningful interaction. On a totally different note, I have been hustling up jobs for when I'm here for the summer. Last week I was the receptionist for this preschool. Really I have never got paid for doing so little at a job before. I just stared at walls. Literally the phone rang maybe 5 times. I even volunteered my help but they said they didn't need it. I reread the same newsletter from last February over and over again. I memorized meaningless preschool camp calendars. I shuffled papers and pretended to write things down so as not to look like the Most Useless and Unneeded Employee on Earth. Seriously staring at walls all day just makes you feel stupid. I could literally see the wasted time slipping away like I was trapped inside one of those sand hourglasses. Oh the futility of bureacracy, how I love thee and your wasted government dollars. Seriously I am thinking about starting a support group for useless employees who know they should be cut during company size downs but are having trouble coming to terms with it. Cuz I have no problem coming to terms with it. I could definetely lead that group to recovery. When I got bored enough at the job I started looking at these files of preschoolers that contained their personal information. This was a strange experience. For example, children's medical problems were listed. Just the typical stuff until I got to one child who had listed: hives, excema, asthma, allergy to whole milk (but can eat whole milk cheese and ice cream). Seriously that's what it said, almost verbatim. What the fuck is that? You cannot be allergic to whole milk but eat WHOLE MILK PRODUCTS!!! The kid just doesn't like milk! But they love ice cream! Get over it! Plus having so many medical problems at such a young age just indicates hypochondriac parents to me. It's like they looked on wrongdiagnosis.com and gave their child all the wrong diagnoses possible when really they just probably don't like milk!!! I'm sorry, life may be full of wars and divorces and natural disasters, but life is not cruel enough to give one child both excema AND an allergy to whole milk. Also some of the children had code words listed under their names. I think these are words the teachers say to calm them down when they are having a fit or something but they were really strange words. One was Juneau (like the capital of Alaska, what fucked up preschool kid would want that remote place as their code word of calm and peace?), another was petMichael (and the kid's name was Michael, molestation much?). Anyways this week I got my dream job of working with baked goods at a 24 hour deli. More to follow on that later I assure you. Also I have decided to provide you all with a regular service on this here blog. Given my affinity for Yahoo Answers I will update with my favorite Yahoo Answers Q and A page of the week. Hilarity ensues shortly.