So it's only January 5th and I already have two tickets-one parking ticket and one driving ticket for-SURPRISE!-old tags. I got pulled over yesterday on the way to work, and I was so pissed cuz the car behind me, separating me from the cop, suddenly dodged out of the way and then I was stuck at a red light in front of the cop and then the cop got me. When I rolled down my window, I held out my freshly-received parking ticket for him to prove that I was AWARE THAT I NEED NEW TAGS.
"Sorry, but that's a parking ticket. That has nothing to do with the police. Your license and registration please?"
"WHAT?? Look, the reason I can't get new tags is because my registration is on hold because I have $600 worth in tickets already and I can't pay those either, so giving me a ticket will just screw me worse."
"License and registration please?"
"I'm going to throw it out the window once you give it to me. Or maybe just shove it under my car seat to show to other cops who will pull me over tommorow. I'm not going to be able to pay it, you see, so this will not fix my problem."
"Well, why can't you pay your tickets?"
"Because I'm a teacher. And we make shit pay. In fact, I'm going to be late for my shit pay teaching job in about 15 minutes and I'm 30 mintues away from work.And before I was a teacher, I was a student, and now I am in debt from being a student."
So of course the cop takes his fucking sweet time writing down my information, looking at my license with my old old old address on it (that's 3 addresses old), and at my obviously expired registration. Finally he comes back.
"You know, I used to be a teacher."
"Well, now you're a police officer and your pay starts at $50,000. I saw it on a billboard. That's, like, more than my shit pay."
Blank stare.
"There's no point to education because it just leaves you in debt and you can never get OUT OF IT!!!!"
"Umm, okay miss..."
I roll up my windows and start speeding. Can't get two tickets from the same cop immediately after the last, right? Knowing me, you can, and I will.
"Sorry, but that's a parking ticket. That has nothing to do with the police. Your license and registration please?"
"WHAT?? Look, the reason I can't get new tags is because my registration is on hold because I have $600 worth in tickets already and I can't pay those either, so giving me a ticket will just screw me worse."
"License and registration please?"
"I'm going to throw it out the window once you give it to me. Or maybe just shove it under my car seat to show to other cops who will pull me over tommorow. I'm not going to be able to pay it, you see, so this will not fix my problem."
"Well, why can't you pay your tickets?"
"Because I'm a teacher. And we make shit pay. In fact, I'm going to be late for my shit pay teaching job in about 15 minutes and I'm 30 mintues away from work.And before I was a teacher, I was a student, and now I am in debt from being a student."
So of course the cop takes his fucking sweet time writing down my information, looking at my license with my old old old address on it (that's 3 addresses old), and at my obviously expired registration. Finally he comes back.
"You know, I used to be a teacher."
"Well, now you're a police officer and your pay starts at $50,000. I saw it on a billboard. That's, like, more than my shit pay."
Blank stare.
"There's no point to education because it just leaves you in debt and you can never get OUT OF IT!!!!"
"Umm, okay miss..."
I roll up my windows and start speeding. Can't get two tickets from the same cop immediately after the last, right? Knowing me, you can, and I will.
posted by Two Buck Chuck at 9:29 PM
2 Comments:
Sometimes, when I'm alone, I feel my breasts for lumps.
Wow, you know you're heading down the wrong path when you and mom have almost identical convesations (I witnessed her no-tag-pull-over fiasco) and it was startingly similar..
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