I have truly been missing out on a well-rounded and complete life because I have not been a regular viewer of Wife Swap. I think I'm in love with this episode I'm watching. A woman from California who's an anal martial arts freak meets a slob family from New Jersey where the 12 year old daughter puts pseudo-porn pics of herself on the web. I don't think I could dream of a better scenario. Unless you're counting my dream where the pig-people were trying out for a play and my mom got cast in the leading role. In other news, I lost the Whopper Challenge! The challenge was to eat 5 Burger King Whoppers in an hour. Sound easy? I dare you to try it. I ate 3 1/2 in about 30 minutes and then physically could take no more and threw it all up. Today I have pains in my sides and most likely my sodium and cholesterol levels went up by a bajillion percent. Mmmmmm. The grossest part was the mayonaise. I hate mayonaise and it was oozing out of the sides of the buns, taunting me. I repeat, mmmmm. Anyways gotta go watch the swap of the wives. I must say, an even better show would be Dildo Swap. Maybe by the end both families could learn to love eachother and share one.